giddy little girl

remember when you were 13 and you would get giddy over just thinking about the boy you had a crush on? and you get butterflys (in a good way) when he would say Hi to you in the hall? And you would just about fall off your chair when he sat by you in class? remember those days? The simplest things, the simplest moments, were the biggest and most important.

sure they are fun to laugh at now, as adults, when we know what real love is, and we know that just because someone says HI to you doesn't mean that they are in love with you.

but you know what? maybe those 13 yr old girls aren't as dumb as we think they are. (ok they totally are, but here me out on this....)

I feel as giddy as a little girl right now.

I cannot even tell you how excited I am about my date with James tomorrow. the more I think about it and the more I think about just having a day - an entire DAY - just to ourselves - it gives me butterflies. fo reals.

so what are we going to do?

 1) go out to breakfast at Roll Up crepes place with the ginormous owl - has anyone tried that? I have wanted to check it out, mostly because it is so weird. and tiny. I am curious.
2) Go to the dollar movies and watch Real Steel. I have a crush on Hugh Jackman, and yes, James is ok with this. And he also knows that is the main reason I want to watch this movie. Perhaps James has a man-crush on him as well, because otherwise I don't think he would be willing to go see it. it didn't look awesome. haha.

3)shop for new running shoes/clothes. Stoked about this.

4)get changed into my new dress (yes I bought it, and yes I will take pics. because it DOES look fab!) and James will get all handsome for me.

5)go out to Shoga for sushi. that place is tiny, low-light, flowers on each table - very romantic. Love it.

6) going to see The Vibe. apparently it's some fabulous dance group, but I'm motivated to see it because it has 2 of my fave dancers from last season's SYTYCD, and James even enjoys watching talented dancers...so...win-win.

7) if we have time, we will go get dessert and/or stop by a friends birthday celebration.

And that's our day. I am so SO excited. And I realized something - this feeling, as sad as it is, is actually not that common among married couples. The more I talk to other women, the more I realize that love does in fact fade over time....or at least, it can. it doesn't have to. I talked to my boss who is a bishop and he talked about how he has had to deal with many couples that struggle simply because they stopped "courting." He recommends each couple go on a weekly date, every 6 months have an overnighter, and once a year take a trip - all with NO children. At first I thought "whoa, that's a lot to ask!" but then I realized...we actually do that. not thinking about it, but the last couple of years we have jsut happened to follow that. And I can promise you that our relationship is so much better, so much stronger then it was prior to our dating-during-marriage.

We talk about things more. We laugh and goof off more. We see different sides of each other when we try new things together. Things that wouldn't happen at home when we are hanging out with the kids. Hanging out with your kids is great - but if you do not build your relationship with your spouse continually, your marriage will eventually become a surface level relationship. And I can say that because I've seen it happen more then once and all at different points in marriage. Sometimes it's after 7 years...sometimes it's after 15, or 5, or even 1. It's easy to get lost in the day to day mundane life. It's love that makes those things mean anything at all. And so it is your love that you should be building, working on, etc. If you had a BF/GF and they didn't call you just to chat, or you didn't go out with them every friday - you would probably be mad at them. But for some reason, we get married, and just because we use the same dishes and toilet we feel like the dating can decrease. Complete opposite, people.

When I was telling James about the advice my boss was giving me, and how I was surprised that so many people stopped dating after marriage, I said "maybe it's just easier for us because if I didn't get a break from the kids I'd go insane." And James kind of nodded half heartedly like he wasn't paying attention - and then he said the cutest thing ever that started this giddyness in the first place:

"I don't know if it's that...I just like being with you."

me too, babe. me too.

love that man. love that we can go play like kids and have fun. love that he spoils me. love that he makes me laugh. love that he is a goofball. love that he lets me be me.

love that he loves me.